HEALTH & HIPS EDITION

Daily Zing — August 1st, 2025 | Manchester Hippity Hop, No More Hip Pain! Sandbach resident and self-proclaimed ultrasound enthusiast reports a medical miracle after a morning hobble turned heroic. "I was moving like a haunted shopping trolley," he confessed. "Then I remembered my 8-watt, 1MHz massage device—small enough to fit in my sock drawer, powerful enough to topple Big Pharma’s stock prices." In what can only be described as a seismic shift in self-care, he zapped his aching hip and claims the pain vanished quicker than a GP appointment slot. Ultrasound therapy : once reserved for hospital backrooms and sci-fi, now apparently the cure-all for arthritis, cancer, and boredom. "When I saw Deborah and we booked the Sandbach five-star trip for my birthday, I thought hip pain might ruin it. But two buzzes and a cuppa later—I’m dancing like it’s 1995." Big Pharma declined to comment, though one anonymous CEO was seen whispering “oh no…” into a test tube....